I’m currently experiencing a problem of biblical proportions.

I’m so sick of reading the Bible. I can’t talk about it with anyone IRL because the Bible-readers will all be horrified because I’m a godless heathen now, and the non-Bible readers will just be confirmed in their suspicions that it’s not worth reading anyway.

It’s not that I don’t value the Bible or see it as a fount of wisdom and truth, it’s just that I’ve read, discussed, read, analyzed, read, debated, read, taught, and read it so many times that I’m now just like, “Oh, not again!” I read it at my women’s prayer group. I read it with my children for homeschool. I read it at catechism class. And then I sit down to read it on my own and just can’t even bring myself to open it.

Mostly, I’m just really tired right now because my life is chaotic and I hardly get any sleep, so when I open up my Bible, the words just swim in front of me and I regularly nod off. Like, I just start snoozing right there, on the couch, with the Good Book for a lap-warmer.

I try reading it in the morning, but I’m too stressed-out to focus. I try reading it in the afternoon, but I’m too worn out to focus. I try reading it at night, but zzzzzz…

I keep telling myself that I just need to make time for it. I write it on a schedule and then purposefully ignore the schedule. I’m not ignoring God, I just… I just… I just really want to read other stuff right now. M’kay?

And the fact is, I don’t even read anything else. I punish my no-Bible-reading self by deciding to read the Bible first. So, I don’t read the Bible first, and then I never even get around to not-reading other things. I’ve got fantastic non-fiction books just piling up in my literary traffic-jam, with their due dates fast approaching, but I feel totally guilty reading them.

Well, no more. I’m taking a Bible-reading hiatus. I’m going to read a bunch of other stuff, and then I’m going to go back to my regular Bible study. Maybe things will be better this summer, when I’m not in any groups or classes anymore and start craving the Word, rather than feeling like the Word is my day job.

Europe has been hit by a wave of protest suicides, mostly immolations concerning the economic system. But today, Dominique Venner, a conservative writer, left a note on the altar of Notre Dame and shot himself. He was protesting the introduction of gay marriage — and the end of civilization it harkens — in France.

May God have mercy on his soul.

(h/t Projekt Ernstfall)

We talked about whores last time, so now I think it’s time to discuss sluts. Specifically, how men view them. I’ve been watching this dynamic for a while, and have experienced it in all its fascination myself, so I’ve got a pretty good handle on it now. There is a cardinal rule for sluttiness that no woman should discount:

All sluts are equal, but some sluts are more equal than others.

In other words, it’s always wrong to have extramarital sex (I am not a slut apologist), but there is an innate hierarchy of sluttiness, and the lower you go down the hierarchy, the fewer men will want to marry you. In other words, it is always bad to be a slut, but most men will tolerate a certain amount of sluttiness (just as they will tolerate a certain amount of laziness, or indebtedness, or drunkenness, or craziness, or etc.). How much they will tolerate has to do with how otherwise-desirable you are and how low you are on the sluttiness-scale.

So, let’s look at this hierarchy and then you are free to discuss it, throw verbal tomatoes at me, or etc.

1. Had a long-term relationship (LTR) or two with a guy who reminds you of yourself or someone you aspire to be. These are generally women men won’t even call a slut because they really just can’t get upset enough to be all mean about it. These women arguably have a higher MMV than virgins in the 25+ pool, but a lower one in the teens.
2. Had a string of LTRs with guys who remind you of yourself or someone you aspire to be. Maybe one ONS or STR, but regretted it and didn’t repeat it. I.e. your average chick in the dating pool. Most guys won’t call such women a slut, but they’ll think it if she turns him down for a date.
3. Slept with more men than she can count on two hands, but all of them were men who remind you of yourself or someone you aspire to be. She’s really pushing her luck and may end up left on the shelf if she’s too picky.
4. And here I get controversial and all psychological. I’d argue that, even more than partner-count, the thing that gets men really upset, really riled up, is if they think she’s been sleeping with men who do not remind them of himself. If he’s of a difference race, religion, socio-economic class, nationality, ethnicity… there’s always something, and it’s a slightly different set for each man. There’s some differentiation men make in their minds that puts women right out of the running.

I got a tip-off about a minor Twitter controversy while reading Cane’s post on the benefits of hypergamy:

There is a conspiracy, but it’s not so much run by women as it is run by very rich and powerful (in a worldly sense) men, and perpetrated on average women (which is almost all of them) who don’t even rise to the level of co-conspirator. They’re simply not that smart, important , or powerful enough to be anything but CONSUMERS of the conspiracy. Actually elite women are some of the most hurt by this paradigm. Don’t believe me: Ask John Legend’s model fiance Chrissy Tiegen about Farrah Abraham. Her rage isn’t because somebody banged Farrah, but because all you have to do to make national news is get knocked up as a teen and then make a sextape. I’d never heard of Tiegen before this, but she’s apparently kind of a big deal–and here she is outshined by a common (6 looks; considering physique) whore at the whim of the owners of Viacom and Vivid–companies run by elite men.

Now, I’ve addressed precisely this phenomenon in a previous post. The absolute deluge of sexual attention that mediocre-looking and skanky-acting women now get is one of the bedrocks of feminism. Because we women crave attention more than anything, a system that gives the middle-majority an enormous amount of it is virtually indestructible (until the money runs out, but that’s a different topic).

But here I want to concentrate on something from the magazine article. Here’s what Chrissy Tiegen tweeted:

farrah abraham now thinks she is pregnant from her sex tape. in other news you’re a whore and everyone hates you whoops not other news sorry

— christine teigen (@chrissyteigen) May 14, 2013

and she was hit by a wall of outraged tweets about her supposed “slut-shaming”.

Definitely unfollowing @chrissyteigen. Wish she’d use this opportunity to learn that slut shaming IS bullying rather than call us idiots. — Christina (@Christina_J1210) May 15, 2013

Has @chrissyteigen always been an employee of Patriarchy Inc. or is her slut-shaming more recent? — Anti_Intellect (@Anti_Intellect) May 15, 2013

Now, if people were complaining about Chrissy saying “everyone hates you”, I might sympathize. I don’t hate this woman. In truth, until she became a whore, I’d never even heard of her. Now she’s a famous whore, so why the outrage? Shouldn’t she be thanking Chrissy for the free publicity? After all, she’s got a sextape to sell. (So much for prostitution being illegal in America.)

But that’s not how it went down. She called an actual prostitute a “whore”, and people were outraged. Yes, if people pay you directly to have sex, then you’re a prostitute and a whore. Is this news to anyone? Porn stars are prostitutes, even the supposedly amateur ones, just as are the chicks trading “ass for gas” or giving it up for a sugar daddy. But nobody is allowed to point out that they’re a whore because it might make them feel bad about being a whore. The problem isn’t that she called Farrah a whore, but that she called her a whore as if it were a bad thing. Seriously.

It is the job of all Christians to make sure that whores feel good about being whores.  #ThingsJesusNeverSaid

At least some of her followers had some kind of sense:

@chrissyteigen Oh god. Just stalked your mentions and saw someone ask why it’s bad to be a whore. How do you deal? Crazy!

— BrandiMarie (@ItsBrandiMarie) May 15, 2013

It’s not bad to be a whore. It’s a legitimate choice and women need to be empowered to make choices. Who are we to judge them?

Jesus said that we are not to judge the behavior of anyone because that’s mean and it might make them feel bad. #ThingsJesusNeverSaid

Kim Kardashian is a whore. So is Paris Hilton. So is Farrah Abraham. That’s not shaming, that’s called using the English language to call a spade a spade and a whore a whore. Being a whore is their actual, real-life profession. That’s what they do in order to pay their bills and I don’t understand why we’re supposed to pretend like they aren’t doing it. Our society is so downright depraved that we can’t even speak plainly about the things people are openly doing without them feeling ashamed and getting defensive.

Why should they be offended? Is that double-plus ungood? If I call a dentist a dentist, will they cry and claim patriarchal oppression? “I’m not a dentist! I’m just misunderstood.”

If you don’t want people to call you a whore, then don’t be one. Or, you know, at least try to keep it on the down-low, rather than issuing sextapes of yourself having anal sex with a pornstar and humble-bragging about how much money you made off of the transaction.

And now put a shirt on, Chrissy.

#EnjoyTheDecline

Because there’s just no end to it. Because there’s just no limit to it. Because, who needs Jesus when diversity can save your soul? From Anglican Ink:

The Presiding Bishop of the Episcopal Church has denounced the Apostle Paul as mean-spirited and bigoted for having released a slave girl from demonic bondage as reported in Acts 16:16-34 .

In her sermon delivered at All Saints Church in Curaçao in the diocese of Venezuela, Bishop Katharine Jefferts Schori condemned those who did not share her views as enemies of the Holy Spirit.

She gives a verbal hug to Teh Gayz and then goes on to completely butcher a scripture passage before ending with:

“Looking for the reflection of God’s glory all around us means changing our lenses, or letting the scales on our eyes fall away. That kind of change isn’t easy for anyone, but it’s the only road to the kingdom of God.”

Salvation comes not from being cleansed of our sins by the atoning sacrificial death of Jesus Christ, but through the divinization of humanity through the work of the human will. “We are here, among all the other creatures of God’s creation, to be transformed into the glory intended from the beginning. The next time we feel the pain of that change, perhaps instead of annoyance or angry resentment we might pray for a new pair of glasses. When resentment about difference or change builds up within us, it’s really an invitation to look inward for the wound that cries out for a healing dose of glory. We will find it in the strangeness of our neighbor. Celebrate that difference – for it’s necessary for the healing of this world – and know that the wholeness we so crave lies in recognizing the glory of God’s creative invitation. God among us in human form is the most glorious act we know.”

I don’t even know what to say to that. I’m just absolutely horrified. Read the whole thing.

Conversation ongoing here.

I am extremely disturbed, to say the least.

As Christians, we believe in the family as an essential unit of society. The family is hated by Satan because it is a reflection of the divine order. It starts with parents first– our Father, whose Son Jesus was conceived in the Virgin Mary, The Mother of God. For Jesus recognized His parents and taught the importance of parental roles. But we’ve come a long way, baby– to find out 2,000 years later, those roles mean squat. At least, that’s what we’re being led to believe, and the trend is quite scary.

Any sign of parental defect is used as a basis for undermining the sovereign role of parents over their children, regardless of any perception bias, baseless accusation, or delusion of grandeur. This reasoning alone is used to justify the concept that parents should not be the ultimate authoritative gatekeepers of their children. Those who support this concept often decry how children are not the property of their parents. While it is true that children are not property in the sense that a car is property, or a house; children are still under the primary care and teaching of their parents and if anyone wishes to go to the child, they need to go to the parents first. The Church teaches that parents are the authority figures over a child, but even more so, children are gifts bestowed unto parents. A child isn’t an object, but a gift to parents, and parents have the final responsibility, duty, and authority to provide the care and love for their child. This relationship transcends the material idea of mere property.

But there are those who seek to do away with this.

Apparently, children belong to everyone. At least, that is what people like Melissa Harris-Perry want you to believe. Her philosophy stems from the idea that children are indeed property, and they are the property of everyone within a community. She attempts to argue that children aren’t private property of the parents; they are collective property instead. In short, she promotes the theft of children in order to further the public school agenda. In spite of the faulty reasoning, it’s picking up traction. It’s been happening ever so subtly under our very noses.

Public schools already believe children belong to them. They were daring to say the least, when a middle school deceptively used an anti-bullying campaign cover to teach pro-homosexual behavior. Why would a school bypass parental authority to teach about sexuality that should be first addressed by parents? Sadly this isn’t new, as schools were giving out Plan B to 13 year old girls without parental knowledge or consent. Public schools have already decided that children are sexual agents they can conduct social experiments on, and parents just have to deal.

It gets worse when medical professionals decide to go against the orders of their own and then remove a child because the parents wanted a second medical opinion before allowing their infant to undergo a surgical procedure. It doesn’t stop there– parents are noticing doctors asking to be alone with their preteen girls to talk about contraceptive use and the administration of Gardisil, all in the name of “health.” Are parents treated with such disdain that they cannot even be taken seriously concerning the medical care of their own children?

And homeschooling? We might be kissing that one goodbye.

Harris-Perry’s argument rests on the premise that children belong to “the collective.” It’s just a codeword for the State. We’ve seen that one before:

But we know what it’s really about:

We were deaf to their echo?

We are the Borg…Your culture will adapt to service us. Resistance is futile

The reality is that the wife at home today has a more flexible schedule with more leisure  built in than the wife of 100 years ago, and certainly more than the days when Proverbs 31 was penned. No matter how busy I am, I find at the end of most days (the time before I began preparing dinner) I have spent what amounts to a good 2 hours of leisure. Some of what I consider leisure my husband considers vitally important to my health, well being, and ability to be a charming companion at days’ end. He actively supports and encourages these “leisure” activities as they help me stay balanced:

Daily Priorities List

The big priorities of the day include cooking two or three meals, washing and folding at least two loads of clothes, schooling our young children, errands, and light gardening. With the exception of weekly cleaning projects and purging, most of the day to day cleaning is tackled by our older children. This is the template I use for remembering to do weekly maintenance cleaning. These are things that I do myself:

Weekly to do list

Even with that, I still have a fair amount of down time.  And yet…my husband is adamant with regard to my being at home. My physical availability is extremely important to him. If he has time to come home for lunch, he wants me here. If he needs me to make calls or do expense reports or something else, I need to be able to do that. If you ask him the one thing he values most from me besides the big three: wifely duties, motherhood duties, and meals, he would say availability. That’s his thing, and he is totally fine with the fact that I spend time blogging so long as my duties are fulfilled, the children are well cared for, and I am available to him. My goal is to be focused enough to ensure that the most important things are getting done, which is the point of this post.

I want this post to be encouragement for floundering homemakers so I’ll make a confession. I am not a good homemaker, naturally. I am not that woman who hits the ground running every morning, whose home runs like a well-oiled machine. Things get done around here. Plenty of things in fact. I do them fairly well and manage to look pretty good while doing so. I just have to refer to my aids- in the form of the lists- to get anything done. When I don’t have my lists, only the bare minimum gets done. This is still true after 19 years of marriage, and 18 as a full time homemaker. I start with this list of rudimentary things every morning:

Morning to do list

I used to be embarrassed by my dependence on lists and charts because I’ve been at this long enough that  I should be able to do it with half my brain tied behind my back. I’ve since had a change of heart about all that. Having one child was different from having three. Having three children was different from 4, and then 5. Living in a house was different from living in an apartment. Having two cars was different from having one. Homeschooling is different that having children in school all day. Running a home business (and later jettisoning it) marked yet another transition. You get the picture.

The life of a family is always in flux. What works today may not work next month or next year. Job changes, health challenges, children added, children leaving, all of these things mean re-examining the best ways to get the job done. Because I am not a naturally organized person, and I live in my head a lot, I’m no longer ashamed that I can’t be an effective homemaker without a list. The shame would be not adapting the needs of my family to complement my strengths and limitations. I suggest you do the same.

Every night I take out my notebook which has bunches of lists and reminders on it for every task, no matter how small. I jot down extra or impromptu items that aren’t part of the templates. I even include things like making the bed since I rise a full hour before my husband and If I get too busy, I’ll forget to make until later in the day. If I see it there on the list, I remember to do it at a reasonable hour of the morning as I go through the checklist. The lists are all in plastic coverings ad I use colored dry erase markers to check things off as I go. This is our homeschool schedule, which rarely goes off without a hitch, but it helps me manage to get my kids educated:

Daily Homeschool Schedule

For the homemaker struggling with the dilemma of being very busy outside the house, but unable to focus and accomplish your homemaking goals when faced with a lot of time and flexibility while inside your home, I strongly suggest considering writing it all down and working from there. It is truly the only reason I get much of anything done.

And as is my custom, I implore wives to take their cues for what is important in their home from their own husbands. When you do that, you can be nearly assured that your time is not wasted, regardless of what other wives you know may or may not be doing.

Some of the ladies here — well, specifically, two of us — raised some eyebrows in the child bride thread when we suggested that immigrant women who wish to remain in the country should have to prove their good intentions by marrying a native man.

WHAT?!!

Instead of being shocked, take a moment to think about us. We both married Germanic Catholics, and converted and completely assimilated into their culture. We know what we’re talking about.

The idea that people can just move to Western countries en masse, take up residence, and just go about their separate ways, as long as they learn the native language, respect the laws, and hold down a job, is a seriously bad idea. Integration is multiculturalism. If you want to know how your resident foreigners really feel about your culture, find out whether they will let you marry their daughters. That is the one and only legitimate test of assimilation.

Furthermore, any group that marries your daughters, while refusing to let you have equal access to their own, should be regarded as hostile. Because they are.

Elspeth:

Sunday- Pizza, hot dogs, birthday cake (party!)

Monday-Roast chicken, new potatoes, asparagus

Tuesday-Bangers and Mash, green salad

Wednesday- Fried rice noodles with chicken

Thursday- Steak fajitas

Friday- Spaghetti and meatballs

Saturday- Burgers

Don’t say I didn’t warn you.

And you don’t believe that this is true? It is. And there’s nothing unusual about him using a knife, either. They’re still so little at that age.

And more here, if you’re not feeling horrified enough:

Naghma, the Afghan girl sold to be a child bride

and a video of a happy child wedding:

I’m not going to go all bleeding-heart on you and suggest we need to put a stop to this. They need to put a stop to this, and we need to stop letting people into our countries who consider this to be a legitimate custom because those people are totally sick in the head and we have enough home-grown crazies to deal with.