I need to get a divorce or I’m going to mess up the numbers

Posted on July 1, 2013 by

My marriage is such a statistical anomaly that I should run right out and fulfill the prophecy by getting a divorce. Otherwise, everyone’s going to be so disappointed. People have been predicting the imminent demise of my marriage before it was even formally announced.

Here’s the deal, folks.

Most people screw stuff up before marriage, but most people still don’t get a divorce. I was the statistical version of base-jumping when I arrived at the altar, but in our marriage’s particular cohort, the divorce rate is now in the low single-digits. There’s more to staying married than getting married, apparently.

So, don’t let the numbers unsettle you if you’re already married, although they should be food-for-thought when choosing a person to marry.

And no, my husband wasn’t crazy. Obvious religious fanatic was obvious.